The Rhynie Wife
The Rhynie Man is a pictish stone carving of a fierce man with sharp teeth and an axe which was ploughed up in 1978 at a farm at Barflat, Rhynie. (A good description can be found here http://www.aberdeenshire.gov.uk/archaeology/sites/pictish/rhynie.pdf ) Now I always wondered why The Rhynie Man was so angry looking, until I heard a couple of neighbours arguing one night and was inspired to write the following poem. THE RHYNIE WIFE - by Pauline Cordiner He bade up there on the Hill at Rhynie: A fearsome giant that wis far fae tiny! He wiz 12 ft tall, or mair, I’d say And he reeked of stale sweat and decay It could be said that his farts smelt like death But that wis nithin when compared tae his breath! For a’ hopes of dental hygiene were lost For the Rhynie man never, ever flossed. His stinkin feet were a sicht tae be seen The corns and the bunions were jist obscene And a terrible insult to anyone’s nose And he had puir squished sheepies between his toes! He’d stomp a’ roo...